Tag Archives: God

Your Love Was Greater

There is a pain that is so deep it seems unreachable yet tangible, present yet so surreal, forgiven and yet still so grievous.

That pain will always be with me, at least this side of Heaven. Yes, I’m forgiven by God and I’ve forgiven myself but the pain, it never leaves, and I’m not sure I would want it to.

You see, it’s because of that pain that I’m able to love deeply, and to reach out to others who have endured their own painful past.

But because I’m forgiven my past is no longer a reminder of shame and guilt but a platform to lead others out of darkness and captivity into truth and freedom through Christ.

It’s because of Jesus and the pain He endured that I understand the cost of my salvation, a debt I could never repay. Those who have been forgiven much, love much.

My sin was great, Your love was greater. What a beautiful name it is. Jesus. 

We can’t change our past but we can give it to Him and when we do He gives us a message. We can't change our past but we can give it to Him and when we do He gives us a message. Click To Tweet

Tonight I had the house all to myself which is pretty rare so I chose to relax and watch October Baby, a movie very dear to my heart. I’ve seen it many times before but I feel as if I take something more from it each time I watch. It was this quote that stood out to me.

“Only in forgiveness can you be free…”

There’s a part of me that has struggled believing that I had a right to speak out against abortion because I’m a post-abortive woman.

I’ve used my voice to talk about my own pain but to be honest, I’ve worried that if I spoke out publicly against abortion that others would see me as a hypocrite.

But who better to speak out against the atrocities of war than the soldiers who have been on the frontlines – those wounded in body, mind and soul.

I’ve been on the frontlines and I’m telling you, it’s a place you do not want to be. It’s pure evil. And the physical pain cannot compare to the emotional soul-searing pain that endures. Please do not make the same choice that I and so very many others have made.

If you’ve already made that choice please do not feel condemned but know that what Jesus did on the cross was enough to cover your sin and mine.

Your debt was paid, you’ve already been forgiven. All you have to do is receive it and you will be free.

John 8:36 So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.

Where Do We Go From Here?

Recently I reached a milestone birthday – the BIG 5 0 – and in the days since, I’ve also reached the conclusion that age really is just a number.

Those numbers arrived and departed quietly and without any effort just like any other day.

Just. Another. Day.

Day in and day out I accomplish what needs to be done, over and over without effort, without thought, without inspiration.

More and more I’ve come to realize just how disappointing that has been. (I hope you’re imagining the “time to make the donuts” guy)

I look around and see others setting goals and reaching them, celebrating their efforts.

And to be completely honest, I’m envious.

I’m envious of the women who put hours in at the gym and have much to show for their efforts.

I’m envious of the women whose words are being published in books and in articles being read all over the world.

I’m envious of the women who have used their God-given talents and started their own successful businesses.

I’m envious and I have absolutely NO right to be!

You see, they’ve put in the effort. They’ve set goals and they’ve worked hard to reach them. Here I am, day after day, just trudging along not making any effort, not setting any goals and most of all not realizing any dreams.

Oh I’ve made excuses…

I don’t have enough time. I’m too tired. I can’t afford it. I’m too old to start again. And actually a few of those are pretty valid excuses but not helpful if I want to get something I’ve never had, do something I’ve never done or be someone I’ve never been.

Excuses are a death sentence to dreams.Excuses are a death sentence to dreams. Click To Tweet

I’ve subscribed to the idea that selflessness is next to godliness but if I’m envious of what others are accomplishing, isn’t that a twisted form of false humility? (Yikes!)

In the same breath sacrificing self care, and self worth isn’t serving anyone well, and it certainly isn’t serving any good purpose.

Maybe some of you can relate. Maybe (like me) you feel like you’ve wasted a lot of precious time. But I believe there’s still hope for us.

So where do we go from here?

First and foremost we need to set some realistic goals.

Committing to several hours a day in the gym is not realistic (at least not for me) but thirty minutes a day doing something good for our health is doable, right?

Spending several hours a day writing may not be realistic but setting aside a few hours a week certainly should be. Getting it on our schedule is the hardest part but consistency will pay off in the end.

Continue reading Where Do We Go From Here?

A Life Meant To Be Lived


 “There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.”
― Albert Einstein

I was ten years old when I found out that I had been adopted by my dad. In that moment the enemy planted lies that I would believe for many, many years — I was an accident, a mistake, not wanted or planned.

Maybe your story began something like mine and it seemed as if your life was never meant to be but even if your conception wasn’t planned, make no mistakes about it,  you were planned! God’s word says this in Jeremiah 1:5 “Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you. Before you were born, I set you apart for my holy purpose. I appointed you to be a prophet to the nations.”

Sometimes due to circumstances or situations we are led to believe that our lives are an accident, but life is too precise, too complex to be anything other than a miracle.

That’s how it began for every one of us — the miracle of life, the miracle of birth and then miracle after miracle bringing us exactly to where we are today. Sadly, we take most miracles for granted — just think about your heart for a moment, it’s estimated that the heart beats about an average of 100,000 times a day. It does this, for most of us, effortlessly. The average person takes 17,280-23,040 breaths on an average day (without extra exertion as with exercise). Just these two bodily functions alone are regulated unconsciously, always at work, even when we’re sleeping. If your heart is beating and you are breathing, you are nothing less than a miracle! Click To Tweet

A life that wasn’t meant to be, or so it seemed

A lie planted and for years believed

But no mistake made, because He saw me

Before He formed me, He knew all about me

And loved me, in spite of choices made by me or for me

He delighted in me, He longed for me, He chose me

Not forgotten, not lost, not abandoned

Bought for a price, saved for a reason

Created with a purpose and a plan

To live out my days loved by Him, and loving Him.

A life meant to be lived.

If you’ve ever felt like you were a mistake, unwanted, unloved, unplanned, you’re not alone. That is exactly what the enemy of our soul would like us to believe. He whispers those lies and so many more —telling us we’re not pretty enough, thin enough, smart enough, popular enough. After awhile we begin to see ourselves the way he describes us instead of the way our God created us. The more we believe his lies, the farther we drift from God and the plan He has for us.

We were made by God, the Creator of the Universe, and He does not make mistakes. Click To Tweet Refuse to listen to the lies of the enemy, and instead start living your life according to the plans God has for you.

Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV) For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.